Thursday, July 16, 2009
culltus lake water park
On a Saturday morning my daddy yelled, " Katrina , Amanda get a towel and your bathing suits, we are going to Cultus Lake water park".My dad screamed.I was so excited.When we where in the car it was so boring because the drive was two hours long,we where all most at Harrison Hot Springs!when we got there the place was packet,but we got the best parking spot.When we got in the first ride we went on was this big yellow inntertube.It has alot of stair to get on the ride.When you get on you would sway back and forth and at the end you would splash in a big pool of water. ''Dad can we go on the vally of fear?''Iasked.''you can go on but by your self because I'm to scared.'' my dad replied.As we walked toword it looked like a u shape,going straight down and straight back up.We walked up the stairs and into the lineup I started to get scared.I went down and I came 10 inches of the slide it was fun and scary.I came off and Amanda and I went into the pool that looked like a river with a current you would see these innertubes you would sit in them with the current pushing you.mean while my dad was sitting in the hot tub.After 15 minutes Amanda and I went into the hot tube .''Dad can we go on speed slide?'' I asked .'Sure but it will be our last ride''dad said. we start to walk up the five flight of stairs.When I got you could see how hight you were and I was scared because you would be so high I went down and water spashed in to my face when my dad wenthe socked this lady because all this water spade at here .My dad went to the very fast and could not stop but stoped at the very end. after we packed up and went home. the end
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Awsome memoir!
ReplyDeleteExciting story Katrina! It was great!
ReplyDeleteThis sounds like a really exciting day! I remember going to this park when I was about 16. The speed slide was new then and I had never seen anything like it. I remember lying on my back at the top of the slide and peering down at my toes. As I inched slowly forward it seemed that I was disappearing piece by piece. First my feet vanished over the edge, then my calves, and up and onward. For a brief moment I was only a head, and then whoosh... it was all rushing and white water. I only went on that one once that day, and I haven't again since.
ReplyDeleteAbout your memoir: There are times, as a writers, where we realize that our stories contain other stories, and that these "other" stories may be the REAL story. Hmmm? Let me explain.
You memoir is about a day at the water park, and you do a very nice job of telling it. However, buried within that, (In my opinion) is another story. What would happen if you focused your memoir just on the Speed Slide? What if you just focused your writing on your thoughts and feelings as you walked that long and rickety staircase up to the launch pad? Imagine all of the details you could describe as you reached the top of that tower and looked out over the water park and all of the tiny ant people below. There is an entire story there!
Every time you write a piece like this, ask yourself, "Where is the real story here?"
Thanks for sharing and for your hard work in class!
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ReplyDeleteWhat a long comment Mr.T!
ReplyDeleteby the way Katrina i like your memoir!
ReplyDeleteYou were very brave. I like you story. I was great.
ReplyDeleteIt. I meant it
ReplyDelete